It has been almost a month of avoiding doing what I said I'd do when the Quarantine began. I've been disobeying the rules and going places every once in a while just so I can see all the things we expected to need by now. I'm not reading enough, I'm not writing enough, I'm not exercising enough. Instead I'm lounging too much I'm eating too much I'm drinking too much. Today I learned that the blessings I have might not be anymore. I don't want to look at all the things we thought of as normal as poignant curiosities anymore. All I want is to lie still -- still enough that the Horror can't find me. c.2020 EMM "chuchotement" is French for a whisper